Replace Resolutions with Reflections

…without reflection we go blindly on our way..failing to achieve anything useful.

Margaret J. Wheatley

2019 was a very BIG year for me. It was the year I decided to retire and the year I made it happen. Given that I started working when I was 16, this was one of the most significant decisions of my life. The transition to this new chapter has been revealing, surprising and satisfying.

The tool that has become invaluable in this process has been regular reflection – taking time to step back and be the observer of my experience. Margaret J. Wheatley, an American writer, notes this truth: “Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences, and failing to achieve anything useful.”

Typically, New Year resolutions are unsuccessful because we’re not really committed to making the change on January 1, we’re unrealistic about the size of the change, and we haven’t learned from our past experience. In the weeks left in January, consider replacing resolutions with reflections. Take time to think and journal about the past year. Here are some topics to guide you:

Celebrate 2019. Pull out your calendar, photos, and journals to help you recall all the wonderful adventures you had in 2019. Make a list of compliments, accomplishments and tasks checked off. Remember the moments of awe, joy and laughter. Start the year with a good dose of “good job.” I think you’ll discover you lived more than you realized.

My greatest celebration was honoring an amazing career. I was the luckiest person ever because I was given opportunities to use my skills and talents every day to help others be healthy and happy.  

Recognize the lessons you learned in 2019. If there was a theme of 2019, what was it? What wisdom do you want to take with you into 2020? What do you want to leave behind? What worked for you? What didn’t work for you? 

One of the lessons I’ve learned (again) is how hard I am on myself. In 2020. I want to lower the volume of my Critical Terri Voice (or turn it off completely), who is never satisfied with what I’m currently doing and consequently taints the joy of the moment.

Look ahead. Where do you want to be next year at this time? Do you know the changes you’re really ready to work on? Based on what you’ve learned about yourself, what changes are realistic? When will be the right time to start working on them?

I’m looking ahead to discovering more about what retirement means. I’m passionate that aging is a time of continued growth and development, not a downhill coast. There is a new life chapter waiting to be experienced and 2020 will define the course.

By replacing resolutions with reflections, New Year’s Day and the month of January can become a new version of fun and celebration. The result of taking pause before taking action is increased clarity on the way forward to becoming our best selves.